eyes of glass will break and then you can't see. fact.

The day after the holidays. People are everywhere on the highways, little ants from hell.

Brett will not be coming to Vemont this week. He called yesterday and there are many reasons he won't be here. The biggest reason, my life is unfair. Its not unfair in the woe is me sort of way, its unfair in the fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck way. There may be a reason I don't get these things. There may be a reason that when I think things may be getting really good, they suddenly take a turn that make my life feel more and more like chore. A stupid chore like washing dishes or mopping. With all these chores you'd think I'd have the cleanest life ever, squesky clean. But its not, it is messy and ridiculous and smelly and changing and for the most part I enjoy the ride but sometimes I feel like someone let me on the ride before I was tall enough. People who work on those rides need to be better at their fucking jobs.

i had a wonderful holiday week even though I'm bitching. But I can't help thinking I should have been in Boston this weekend, enjoying an awkward dinner with Mr. B Smalls family. A part of me feels a little jipped because other people get laid during the holidays. Whatever those people suck balls.

Still, I'm not crying. I veto tears.